Logan Lucky – 8/10 Times You’ll Call it Lucky Logan, Guaranteed

An idyllic spring day in one of NYC’s premiere parks for the wealthy and powerful, a sharply dressed man approaches a park bench where an unassuming, bald man waits patiently for the squirrels to finish picking at the carcass of a pigeon. The two men catch one another’s gaze. This meeting was planned. The sharply dressed man takes a seat next to our bald hero. This is the origin story of Lucky Logan…scat…LOGAN LUCKY.

STUDIO EXEC: Hey Steven Soderbergh! Remember that fun casino heist movie you made with those 11 good looking and funny guys a little over a decade ago?

STEVEN SOD:  Ocean’s 11? Yeah of course!

STUDIO EXEC: Right! Would you mind making another one for us. We could use some extra cash and a little boost to our reputations as big time movie producers.

STEVEN SOD:  But Studio Executive, I already made two sequels for you guys. Oceans 12 and Oceans 13. And last I heard you guys were cooking up some chow for the internet trolls in the form of an all female version of Oceans called Oceans 8. What do you need me to do another for?

STUDIO EXEC: First of all, how creative are we with all these sequel titles?! No wonder we’re big time movie producers.

STEVEN SOD:  Totally!

STUDIO EXEC: and B. We just really want another…ppllleeeeeasssssseeeee. If you don’t we’ll be ever so cross.

STEVEN SOD:  Alright. But we gotta do something different this time.

STUDIO EXEC: How about no titles with the number of people involved in the heist?….and no Brad Pitt either. He’s kinda sad now. And we should really get to the core of what Americans love, too.

STEVEN SOD:  Agreed.

Both sit ponderously staring off into the middle distance, contemplating how to make oodles of luscious cash money.

STEVEN SOD:  I got it!

STUDIO EXEC: Lay it on me, daddy!

STEVEN SOD:  Instead of a robbing a casino. Let’s rob a NASCAR Race!

Studio exec’s eyes widen with growing excitement as he leans in closer, beads of sweat fusing with the saliva now pouring from the corners of his mouth.

STEVEN SOD:  And instead of Jason  Bourne, Tyler Durden, and Bat-nipples pulling the heist, let’s get Magic Mike, Kylo Ren, and James Bond! Then just cuz we can, lets get that bro from Family Guy and Ted, put a wig and mustache on him, and make him talk in a British accent for a character that is utterly inconsequential to the events of the movie.

Studio Exec convulsing with lust and arousal, gathers himself, then leans in, grabs Steven by both shoulders and whispers…

STUDIO EXEC: Go make this happen…

With a gentle kiss on the forehead, Steven is sent off on his quest and sometime later, Lucky Logan…weak, there’s 2…LOGAN LUCKY arrives in theaters for all to enjoy. At least that’s one possible scenario in which this film was conceived.

So to peel away the mild cynicism and silliness (who doesn’t love a good alliteration) Lucky Logan…see told ya…LOGAN LUCKY is a fun, clever, fresh update on Steven Soderbergh’s seminal Oceans 11 films (although Oceans 12 kinda sucked) and is a must see either in the theaters now (preferred option) or a few months down the road on VOD/Netflix/Hulu/that-weird-Bulgarian-site-your-craigslist-roommate-claims-is-legit. Unfortunately, however,  not quite the money grab that the film was expected to be, and honestly deserved to be.

In fact, as far as I can tell the only real crime in or around Logan Lucky…nailed it…was how poorly it was marketed. Well that and the multiple felonies that comprise the very premise of the film’s plot and story. Regardless, Lucky Logan…I just had it…LOGAN LUCKY should’ve been a mid-summer hit commercially, in addition to being the critical hit ’twas. But instead we’re stuck with awful franchise retreads like Transformers and Pirates of the Caribbean taking up all the premo release dates and marketing cash. But I could rant about this for pages so I’ll save it for another post.

So to summarize: yes, Lucky Logan…I’m gonna elbow a cat…LOGAN LUCKY is a fun NASCAR heist thriller with a team of good-ole-southern boys played by Channing Tatum, Adam Driver, and Daniel Craig along with a whole slew of other notable actors and surprise cameo’s that will leave you saying “hey, I know that guy/gal” throughout. Oh yeah, Roy from “The Office” is in it too, us mindless consumers love “The Office” right?! Right.

Carrying on: Logan Lucky…crushed it…is expertly acted and directed, balancing drama, thrill, and comedy (no simple feat) and keeps you on your toes from start to finish (2 feet references, 1 sentence). So again, watch Lucky Logan……..LOGAN. LUCKY. Your only regret will be that you hadn’t watched it sooner.

P.S. Remember to pour one out for #3 when you do watch Lucky Logan…I’m just rolling with it now…or really anytime you’re guzzling down a cool and refreshing Bud heavy. Never forget.

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